We Did It Our Way

What Does Individuality Mean in 2022?

As a parent, your child's experiences make you reflect on your own childhood. As my daughters grow older and experience high school, I wonder about the "crowd." What kind of people are my daughters expected to "fit in" with? Do they fit in? What happens if they don't fit in?

The reason I'm writing about this is because I noticed that Jan. 10 is Peculiar People Day. It made me wonder whether being "peculiar" is seen as a good or bad thing nowadays. In my high school, the peculiar people were also the smartest people in school. I grew up in a rougher neighborhood, so the smarter people were never held in high esteem.

In a few short years, though, that changed. The smart kids went to the best colleges. They found the best jobs and bought the best houses and cars. In addition to that, the people who took risks and seemed okay with being different — and not following the crowd — are the ones who are doing the best financially today. It's a story so recognizable to us now that we'd consider it cliche if we saw it in a movie.

That's why I tell my kids to embrace people’s differences and be nice to everyone. Never assume the "cool thing" is the "right thing," either, even outside of the classroom. In my culture, joining a dance team and being passionate about dance isn't necessarily a cool thing to do. Why dance when you're supposed to be focused on becoming a doctor or a lawyer?

But for me, I love seeing how my girls have grown their confidence and self-esteem through dancing. I think it's an important skill to learn how to be different. In life, your individuality becomes something you should comfortably rely on. I had my own college counselor tell me not to pursue my field as a dental lab technician, but I also understood she didn't really know what was best for me.

It had nothing to do with my respect for her, of course. In fact, my parents always taught us to respect others, especially adults, and I took that seriously. But when it comes to standing out and taking risks, I have a lot of great inspiration from my father, too. I've shared in past newsletters that he was a savvy businessman who was no stranger to courageous leaps. Ultimately, I knew that becoming a dental lab technician was something I could really care deeply about, and the risk didn't seem to matter.

No matter what you're doing in life, if you're different you should embrace that. Don't account for people's judgment beforehand, because that won’t matter in the long run. We all have moments in life that we look back on and think, "If I did that over again, I'd do it my way."

At the end of the day, we're all a little peculiar. In 2022, I propose that we give ourselves more moments that we do "our way" — the first time.